My past is real

i get walked into in the hall: sorry
i get knocked and drop my books: sorry
i get pushed against the wall: sorry
i get pushed down a couple of stairs: sorry
i get pushed out the window: sorry
i get run over by a car: sorry
i get murdered: sorry

I don’t want to talk to anyone except my best guy friend… But if I do that then my ex will get pissed & won’t make any attempt to be w/ me. This is fucking ridiculous! :( I need his advice & comfort & friendship!